The Better to Flasheart
by Dragon's Ghost
Summary: Lord Flasheart learns that not all women like to be approached by overzealous, randy men like himself. And one has to trust him to learn the hard way. Not for Flasheart fans who don't like to see the guy being put down.


The Better to Flasheart

SUMMARY

Lord Flasheart is in the trenches again and he's still the same old womanising guy. However, there's a new member of the nursing staff who's young and pretty but doesn't appreciate being lusted after by a randy Lord. Read the events of their first meeting, when Flasheart arrives in the medical wing with no other reason then to check out the local ladies. Sparks fly as Blackadder watches with sadistic satisfaction as a woman, of all people, puts Flasheart back in his place.

STORY

Several high squeals could be heard, along with the loud voice of someone that everyone could recognise anywhere.

Lord Flasheart.

Well, everyone except one person.

"Who's making all of that racket?" asked Maria, the new nurse.

"I do apologise for the disturbance ma'am." said Blackadder, smoothly. "That is Lord Flasheart who has decided to make a small visit to the trenches.

"Oh, the randy bloke that all the lasses are talking about?" asked Maria.

"That'll be him." Blackadder affirmed.

"Great, I thought I'd escaped his kind when I got away from Sheffield." grumbled the woman, looking slightly sour.

Maria, though she had too long a face and tall a figure to be a classical beauty, was a delightful looking lady in her own right. Long brown hair that reached her mid back in its current ponytail and stern emerald eyes that studiously studied everything that came under their observant gaze. Her skin was rather pale, though she was tanned enough to look healthy. She had had to have her nurse outfit specially made, due to the fact that she stood at a little over the average height of a man, rather then a woman. She was curvy, without being busty and had a nose with a straight bridge, and though it was slightly long, it did not look unattractive and, along with her pink lips, made her look rather regal.

Long, slender hands expertly folded the towels that Maria was holding and placed them in the cupboard as the doors opened to admit Lord Flasheart.

"Hello gentlemen!" he said in an abnormally cheerful voice. And then he spotted Maria. "Well, hello." he made to move behind her, but she growled out a few well chosen words.

"Touch me and you'll live to regret it." she growled. flash heart looked slightly surprised.

"Why, my lady, take a look at me and you may reform your opinion." Flasheart said as a way to entice the young maiden. Maria whirled round and glared.

"Why are you in the medical wing if you have no one to visit and no injury or ailment to be cured?!" Maria snapped, making sure that she was not giving any sign of wanting the lusty fool anywhere near her.

"Why, if I were not to visit the ladies they would think that I was neglecting them." he said smoothly, leaning forwards to cup Maria's cheek in his hand.

"It shall soon not be a case of neglect." Maria snarled. "It shall turn into one of abuse if you to not remove your hand from my cheek."

"Why, my lady…"

SMACK!

Flasheart was sent reeling back, clutching his stinging cheek as Maria glared at him with narrowed eyes.

"What was that for?" Flasheart sounded more shocked then anything else.

"No one gets that close to me without my permission." was the angered hiss that Flasheart received. "Now take yourself and get out of this wing. It's disgraceful how you think that any woman you look at will come running to your side to pamper and adore you!"

Flasheart gave the fearsome woman a frightened look before darting from the room, leaving two very smug individuals. Blackadder smirked as he patted Maria on the shoulder.

"Well done cousin Maria." he said cheerfully. "Well done."

"Thank you cousin." replied Maria Blackadder. "I think I'm going to enjoy keeping Flasheart in line."

"And rest assured that I shall enjoy watching you do it." Blackadder joked back, with a satisfied smirk.

Sometimes his dear cousin was even more brilliant then he was.

* * *

I do not own Blackadder. I do not make any profit from this piece.


End file.
